Remembering Greatness 7/13/10

SPORTS

“Now batting for the Yankees…center fielder…number twenty-one…Jesse Bueno.” No matter how old I was (I sometimes still do it now, actually) or how bad a situation might have been, daydreaming the late great Robert Leo “Bob” Sheppard’s flawless baritone uttering those words over the sound system at Yankee Stadium always made me feel better. A fellow St. John’s University alum, that voice was typical of the grandeur and mystique that was the New York Yankees; traits that seem to diminish ever so slightly every time we lose an irreplaceable Yankee legend. Thank you sir, you will be sorely missed.

As will the man who was, without a doubt, the greatest owner in the history of sports, George M Steinbrenner III who passed away today at 80. No one did more as an owner to raise the level of a sport than did “The Boss.” He was the first owner to ever become a part of Pop culture. I mean come on, what other owner do you know that was on Seinfeld and Saturday Night Live? And since 1973 no owner has won more championships or division titles. For less than $10 million he bought the Yankees from CBS and the relative cellar. Nice investment considering the team is worth over $1.5 billion now. Like it or not, he did have a little something to do with that. Was he a bit too hands on? Maybe. Was he without fault? Certainly not. Did he know everything about the game? Are you fucking kidding? He once called Don Mattingly “the most unproductive over .300 hitter in baseball.” Brilliant conclusion; Kinda like saying Patrick Ewing was the shortest 7-footer in the NBA. But you can’t argue that his hard driving style did help bring back the culture of winning.
After winning it all in 1977 and 1978 then floundering in the 80’s, he was banished from baseball in 1990 for his involvement with a shady gambler and upon his subsequent return in 1993, he knew enough to let Gene Michael and the farm system do their thing and bring him a World Series in 1996, then a few more after that. Now, few people may remember that was actually his second ban from the game, as he was similarly banned in 1974 after pleading guilty to obstruction of justice and illegal campaign contributions to Richard Nixon in 1972, the ban coming on the heels of the Watergate scandal.
Regardless of what anyone might have thought about him, he was the first to use an already existing market to better his team. A strong supporter of free agency, you can’t blame Steinbrenner for the ballooning salaries players started to receive back then. Given the profits clubs made, I don’t even think “blame” is the proper word, just ask Curt Flood. Those were the same amounts any team was willing to pay, he just paid more players, and that’s why he won. He was also the first owner to create an entire television network around a team. Sure other teams did follow, but only a team with the history that the Yankees have could have been the first team to pull it off. Not gonna get into writing about the Billy Martin drama…enough has already been said.
Now, I would challenge anyone criticizing Steinbrenner to find me any owner in any sport that put more of his profits back into his team the way The Boss did. And I will further challenge any owner in any sport to open their books and see if your charitable contributions come anywhere near Steinbrenner’s. One of the worst kept secrets in sports was that more kids went to college because of him than any other sports owner, and not once did he ask for recognition for that. But the ultimate testament to his charity could sadly be the fact that when he had his heart attack last night, he was rushed to St. Joseph’s Hospital in Tampa, Florida. I wonder if he passed by the pediatric emergency room; the one that bears his name; the one he donated personally.

Felicidades Espana! A well deserved victory for Spain and an overall satisfying World Cup despite the questionable officiating. A World Cup that for the first time didn’t include Argentina, Italy, Brazil or Germany in the final game, and giving the world a first time winner. A final that went into extra time and yet was not decided by penalty kicks. Great time was had by all…but you know what I will miss most of all? The indisputable power of…the VUVUZELA!!!!!

THIS WEEK’S REASON WHY TERRORISTS WANNA KILL US

And why continue this LeBron James drama? Seriously let's move on now. Writing about a flake like Dan Gilbert and his antics on the same day I’m writing about George Steinbrenner is like a Dave Chappelle segment of “When Keeping It Real Goes Wrong.” Sure Gilbert was full of emotion in his letter to Cleveland Cavalier fans ripping LeBron, but dude, you just alienated every free agent in the NBA from your team. I’m glad David Stern fined this jerk $100,000.

Ahh, ladies a word of advice…Sometimes too much freedom can be a dangerous thing, and if you do something stupid you set the women’s movement back a few hundred years, kinda like the way Flava Flav sets the black movement back every time he wears that stupid fucking horned Viking hat on TV. For the record, I have nothing against a skimpy bikini, and I am the biggest fan of family planning in the history of family planning. However, when going to the beach it is always best to wear beach attire that would, at the very least, cover up your preferred method of birth control. Once again, I have nothing against a nearly totally naked bimbo on the beach, it’s what I’m here for (just like your massive insecurity is why you are here) but I assure you that exposed patch is not sexy, it just screams “Look at me, I get laid and I go bareback!” As if the tramp stamp over your ass and slutty bikini weren’t a big enough clue.