What is it good for? Absolutely nothing. Really. That’s it.The world is literally at war
everywhere. Whether its everyday wars in nations that mainstream media doesn’t
care about, tensions in the South China
Sea, Vladimir Putin’s war in Ukraine,
or Israel pretty much decimating the
Gaza Strip, the World is becoming a
dangerous place rather quickly.
What is so compelling about both these latter conflicts, is
that they are so deep-rooted it doesn’t look there will be a peaceful ending in
sight any time soon. Putin is a megalomaniacal dictator with no one close to
him willing to tell him the truth, which if historically symmetrical, will end
with him in a bunker shooting himself and his girlfriend, as Allied troops close in.
Israel however, presents a much more complicated problem.
The Western states have stood by Israel for decades, and rightfully so. After World War II the creation of a Jewish
state was necessary. To say that anyone else “was there first” is actually
misleading, given the fact that the Dome
of the Rock is built on the Temple
Mount (look it up, I’m exhausted). However, just because you may agree with
Israel’s right to exist, and to defend itself, that does not mean you have to
just blindly agree with how they are
defending themselves. And that is where I have a problem.
The images coming from Gaza of dead children are disturbing
to say the least, and if it is terrorism you are fighting, then hearts and
minds must be won (a lesson that the
United States failed to learn in Iraq
and Afghanistan), and you do not
win them by killing children or attacking hospitals. Yes Hamas has illegally used hospitals as headquarters, but these
people are terrorists, they will not follow the rules of war or the Geneva Convention. Israel is a
recognized state, and they are not behaving like one. And what is worse, from a
tactical standpoint, Israel has one of the best Special Forces units in the
world, and should have used them in operations to mitigate civilian casualties.
Yes that is a risk, but that is the obligation of a civilized nation, and
Israel is failing in that regard. So much so, that they have garnered sympathy
for a terrorist organization like Hamas, here in the US, and that can be very
dangerous.
Remember Americans
love to have something to scream about, even if they have no idea what the fuck
it is. Just last week there was a march on 5th Avenue, right in
front of the Christmas season
tourists, that began as a pro-peace demonstration, and ended up being peppered
with signs of “Fuck Israel” and sympathy towards the government of Gaza, which
is run by Hamas. So Israel’s actions have gotten the ignorant woke mob to
support a terrorist organization. Please do better.
QUOTE OF THE YEAR – “Deeming
race irrelevant in law does not make it so in life.”
—U.S. Supreme Court
Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson, dissenting opinion on Students for Fair Admissions Inc. v. President and Fellows of Harvard
College, June 29, 2023.
If there is one quote that perfectly summarizes what we are
going through as a nation right now, it is this one. My God we were so close.
To go back so far so fast, is something I never thought I would see happen to a
country I love so much. Who would have thought that in only 5 short years, we
would once again be a nation that unfairly levels the playing field in
academia, and would deny a woman the right to choose what to do with her own
body? Still think your vote doesn’t matter? How is that fashionable
indifference and neutrality working for you now? If you do not know the
importance of this particular Supreme
Court decision, I don’t have the time or the energy, so look it up. If you
are a person of color and still don’t know what it is, shame on you.
TV SHOW
OF THE YEAR – “Only Murders in the Building”
I would have thought that by now the same premise would not
be entertaining anymore, but these people just seem to find a way to make this
show so enjoyable every time. This year saw the participation of Paul Rudd and the great
Meryl Streep. I think eventually they are gonna run out of people to kill,
but this is a fun show to watch.
ASSHOLE OF THE YEAR – Rudolph Giuliani
I cannot be the only one who remembers how admired this man
once was. How he held New York City
together after 9/11. How he brought
down the Mafia as a prosecutor in
the 1980’s. Never has the expression “how the mighty have fallen” ever been
better personified.
What is worse, is that I will never understand the “why” of
it all. Why would such a seemingly intelligent man hitch his wagon so firmly
behind a criminal traitor and blissful incompetent like Donald Trump (runner up for this award this year, btw)? Not only
that, but even after he declared his loyalty to his Fuhrer, he had so many
chances to bow out, but instead doubled down and is now facing disbarment,
bankruptcy, losing court verdicts, and possibly even jail time. I usually have
no problem laughing at people like this, but this time I actually feel a little
bad for this guy. OK…whew! That passed…yeah he is still an asshole…
PERSON OF THE YEAR – Jerome Powell, Chairman of the Federal Reserve
If there is one thing I HATE is agreeing with any other
publication but my own, and I hate it even more when another publication beats
me to the punch. So glad to say that, TIME
Magazine’s Person of the Year, is Taylor
Swift and mine…is not. No hate, but it’s just not.
I know many of you have probably never heard of him, but let
me tell you why Jerome Powell, who has been Chairman of the Federal Reserve
since February 2018, has won this award: For some inexplicable, non fact based
reason, inflation is something that President
Joe Biden’s critics have been blaming him for, even though Biden doesn’t
regulate prices. If he did, the GOP would cry too much regulation, the same way
they criticized him last year for, and I’m serious, gas prices being too low, after they were at first too
high. Powell, unconcerned with politics, has played a key role managing high
inflation in the U.S. One his subtle strategies was the concept of something
called a“soft landing.” This, in theory, reduces inflation by raising interest
rates without causing a recession. If you have ever taken economics, you know
this is no easy task. At the beginning of the year, Republicans were animatedly
reminding the country how high and out of control inflation was, not hearing
much about that now are we? Well you can thank Mr. Powell and his policy for that.
The purchasing power of the United States and the World economies that depend
on it are also grateful I’m sure
BIGOTED ASSHOLE OF THE YEAR - Vivek Ramaswamy, PoliticianGOP
Presidential Candidate
OK so this asshole is at such a high level of
asshole-ishness, that sometimes I think he is some sort of parody or a CIA plant. Seriously have you ever seen
such a level of unaware self-loathing on someone who isn’t pathologically
insane? The fact that he doesn’t realize that he is merely a Desi Uncle Tom that the GOP just likes to watch dance and will
never take him or his candidacy seriously is enough to make this guy a sad
clown. Then, instead of acknowledging his diversity he actually doubles down on
GOP hate by saying that even children of immigrants born in the US should not
be here, seemingly blissfully unaware that he wouldn’t be here if that were the
case. Maybe he is a vampire and cannot see his own brown ass in a mirror.
OVERUSED PHRASE OF THE YEAR – “Rizz”
OK I know this is short for “charisma” for you young folks,
but maybe think this through a little more. Change one letter and this takes on
a whole different meaning.
MOVIE OF THE YEAR – “Asteroid City”
Look everyone knows that I am a huge fan of Wes Anderson, and that even his
lesser-received films are classics to me. I was hyped just to see Tom Hanks delivering dead pan lines a
la Anderson, and I have to say I wasn’t disappointed. And yeah, a well-placed Scarlett Johansson nude scene certainly
doesn’t hurt either.
ALBUM OF THE YEAR – “Hackney Diamonds” – The Rolling Stones.
Ok hear me out: So Paul
McCartney plays bass on a song on this album. Ringo is still alive and doesn’t seem to be busy right now. Bill Wyman is retired and Charlie Watts is dead…see where I’m going
with this? I even have a great name for this supergroup that incorporates both
their bands. How about The Rolling Bones?
Get it? They’re old! Ok, don’t unfriend me…
When I thought about this particular entry, I really had to
ask myself whether or not I was being objective. See, this is my all-time
favorite band, and I didn’t want to give them this award unless this album
really was the best music I had heard all year. A year that had some pretty
good stuff come out. Truth is, I didn’t wanna give them this award, but the
record is just too good. I was also thinking maybe next year I’ll make this
section a “Top 3” or something, because Bully,
Depeche Mode, Foo Fighters, and The
National all made really memorable albums this year.
COOLEST SONG BY A MAJOR BAND OR ACT THAT WASN’T A BIG HIT – “Under You” – Foo Fighters.
They are already talking about “But Here We Are” for Rock album of the year. I personally have a
different choice, but this record is still awesome. I, as all other music heads
are aware, realize that Rock music has gone the way of great jazz music: only
appreciated now by a learned few, but I am still surprised that this record
didn’t make more of an impact this year. Yes I know that “Rescued” seems to be the song that is getting its proverbial ass
kissed on social media, but this one is my favorite. It just sounds so much
like the band I always knew, and that is very comforting in an age of such
shitty Pop music. Honorable mention goes to “Somewhere” by Johnny Marr.
COOLEST SONG OF THE YEAR – “103” – The Kills.
I knewvery
little about this band until this song seemed to just hypnotize me. Oh and
honorable mention goes to “Mourning
Dove” by Screaming Females, and “Tropic Morning News” by The National.
COOLEST ACT OF THE YEAR – The National.
Other bands had a great year as afore mentioned, but this
band released not one, but two albums in this calendar year, and they were both
really good. Being called “Dad Rock” if Dad is the only one with a functioning,
articulate brain is not ageism I guess.
BOOK OF THE YEAR-
“Tuesdays With Morrie” – Mitch Albom
I always admit that for someone with a library at home, I
really do not read many newly released titles. This year was no exception. I
read nothing published this year, sorry.
However, on my way out the door on my way to the airport, I
decided to take “Tuesdays With Morrie,“ a book first published in 1997, off my
shelf because it was an easy to carry paperback and I had never gotten around
to reading it. How pleasantly surprised I was.
SPORTS TEAM OF THE YEAR
– The Denver Nuggets NBA
Watching any franchise win their first ever championship is a cool
thing, even if you are not a fan of the team. The Nuggets have had many good
teams throughout the years. I remember the high scoring teams of Alex English in the 1980’s, and the
athletic team lead by Dikembe Mutombo,
Robert Pack and Mahmoud Abdul Rauf
that upset the #1 seed Seattle
Supersonics in the 1994 playoffs. This incarnation is not nearly as flashy,
but they can certainly play. Led by Nikola
Jokic this team just makes it look easy, and they do it quietly. They
dominated the whole season with little fanfare, on their way to the franchise’s
first ever championship.
ATHLETE OF THE YEAR – Naoya Inoue, Boxing
When was the last time Japan gave us a legit champion caliber
boxer? This guy is rewriting history either way, and I already wanna give him
that whole “pound for pound” thing.
So in 2022 he becomes the champ at 118 pounds, and decides
why not jump to 122, just for the fun of it, right? Well why just do that when
you can fight Stephen Fulton, the
champion at 122, in less than a year? So what does Inoue do? Hands him an 8
round beating and relieves him of his belts. And why settle for that when you
can just, in your next fight, unify the belts by beating Marlon Tapales? So yeah he did that too. Other than that, did
anyone else notice this guy? Don’t worry, you will this year.
DEAD PERSON OF THE YEAR – I always start this entry reflecting
on not just one person, because a loss is only measured by how much the person
who is gone has meant to society, or to our own lives, and that can mean so
many people to so many people, know what I mean? This year, I really can’t come
up with just one person that has meant a monumental loss to society.
Tina Turner was a significant loss to
music. Norman Lear pretty much
changed how the entire world watches television. Justice Sandra Day O’Connor made history as the first woman ever to
be appointed to the Supreme Court, and Rosalynn
Carter made the world a better place alongside her husband, President Jimmy Carter, in the second act of his
life as an activist and statesman, who even at his advanced age, was still seen
working on construction sites of housing for the homeless. Keep them all in
your heart should you chose to do so…
Here’s hoping the New Year brings you everything you want!
Well kids, it’s that
time of year again, so let’s do some reflecting, shall we?
NEWS STORY OF THE YEAR – Inflation
Everything is more expensive, isn’t it? Yea, and it’s
happening slowly enough for you not to notice. Look, let me make a suggestion
to you: Never stop going to the market to get your own groceries. It is the
only way to remain in touch with what is going on in the world, let me tell you
why. There are two places where inflation is felt almost immediately, and that
is the supermarket and the gas station. You can listen to all these so-called
financial gurus all you want, but the best way to really monitor the pulse of
this or any nation’s economy is at the two places aforementioned. Right now,
prices at both are incredibly high and you should be demanding more answers
considering that jobs are available and corporate gains are at record highs.
Yes I am taking a bit of an over-simplified approach to this
issue, but that is only because the common working individual is doing the same
thing, and it is their perception that ultimately matters.
PERSON OF THE YEAR – President Volodymyr Zelenskyy of Ukraine
I really fucking hate it when I agree with Time magazine, not because they are not
to be agreed with, but because it seems almost unoriginal and uninspired. But I
cannot deny it, yet again, that they go this one right.
This man has shown incredible resilience and courage staying
in his worn torn country to fight off Russian aggression. For a guy who started
off as a TV comedian, he is now standing very much on the front lines of this
war. A war where he is heavily outnumbered and outgunned. Yet a war that his
country seems to be winning. It was inspiring to see him speak to Congress here
in the US a few weeks ago.
Zelenskyy also gave us the quote of the year, by the way
(see below).
QUOTE OF THE YEAR - President
Volodymyr Zelenskyy of Ukraine
When asked by representatives of the United States
government if he would like to be evacuated from his war torn country, Ukrainian
President Volodymyr Zelenskyy replied, “The
fight is here. I need ammunition, not a ride” If this guy survives this
war, he is gonna be president a long time.
TV SHOW
OF THE YEAR –“Extraordinary
Attorney Woo” – Netflix
The premise of this show is very plausible, and contrary to
the show’s critics, I do not think that the topic of mental illness was handled
irresponsibly. When you decide to deal with such a controversial theme, you
will undoubtedly have critics. That aside, what can I say…18 episodes and I
cried at least once in every one of them. Guess I’m just a tender hearted
person. Right?
ASSHOLE OF THE YEAR – Donald Trump
People often tell me, “Jes, why continue to pick on Trump?
He is done.” Well is he really? Yes it is true that even his cowardly enablers
and ass-kissers in Congress like Mitch McConnell have said that he “no
longer has the political clout he once did.” That is no reason to think that
someone as pathologically narcissistic as Trump would believe that he is done. I
mean, in case you missed it, he did announce that he was running for President
again in 2024.
On Friday six years of Trump tax returns were finally
released to the public, and I must say they raise considerably more questions
than answers. This is probably why Trump had fought so hard to keep them from
the public. Why did he still have foreign bank accounts as president? Why did
he pay no taxes in 2020, the last year of his presidency?
This asshole is the subject of at least four major
investigations into wrongdoing relating to his handling of White House documents, the election, the insurrection, and his
finances. The most significant cases being in Florida; Fulton County, Georgia; Washington, DC; and New York.
Trump's business was also convicted in state court in Manhattan for a payroll tax-dodge
scheme, earning the company felony status and a likely $1.6 million fine.
Then there is a civil lawsuit state Attorney General Letitia James filed Wednesday against Donald
Trump, his businesses and several of his children over alleged fraud. And
that’s just this week!
Prior to this most recent lawsuit, Trump has been involved
in 22 criminal and civil legal investigations, 19 of which are currently
ongoing. I wanted to give you a few sentences on each one so that my readers
could have a better understanding of them, but it’s just too fucking
exhausting, Google that shit. That’s
what search engines are for…
VIRAL CLIP OF THE YEAR – The Wednesday Addams Dance Scene – “Wednesday” Netflix
I really debated whether or not this should even be a
category, but how can you not love this clip? I know it’s kinda bandwagon
jumping, but the fact that it brought a great underrated band like The Cramps back on the pop culture radar
is a bit similar to Kate Bush’s much
deserved resurrection because of “Stranger
Things.”
So go ahead Jenna Ortega/Wednesday
Adams, the moment may only last 15 minutes according to Warhol, but it is most certainly yours…
BOOK OF THE YEAR – “Surrender: 40 Songs, One Story“ - Bono
Just cuz it was the only new book I read this year, doesn’t
mean it wasn’t entertaining. If you are a songwriter, you have to be very
careful not to think you are a novelist. It is, a totally different discipline.
You are more of a poet. However, Bono
does manage to pull it off.
First of all, he is a great storyteller, so that helps. Not
everyone’s life is interesting, so if you are going to write something
autobiographical, you can epically fail if you do not know when and how to
embellish, and when and how to be poetic. I have to say this book did keep me
reading it, so I guess that really is all that matters isn’t it?
MOVIE OF THE YEAR –“Everything
Everywhere All at Once”
Ok so I had no idea that this movie even existed, much less
had come out this year. I was on a 14 hour flight from JFK to Tokyo when I
figured that I might as well watch a movie. The idea of Multiverses (more than
one Universe existing at the same time. Longer conversation required) has
always been fascinating to me.
This film is not a documentary however, it is a work of
fiction that tells a story within that idea. I found every bit of this film
fascinating, even if some of it takes a while to understand.
COOLEST MOVIE WITH SOMEWHAT FAMOUS PEOPLE IN IT THAT YOU STILL
DIDN’T (YET/PROBABLY) SEE BUT YOU
SHOULD HAVE– “The Banshees
of Inisherin”
If there are two people that I have always thought had great
chemistry it was Brendon Gleeson and Colin Ferrell. “In Bruges” was the
first movie they were together in, and I found that so enjoyable I gave it to
some friends as Christmas gifts.
This film is a bit darker, but equally enjoyable due to the way these two
actors seem to have a great time interacting with each other.
Now I must warn you, this movie is not “In Bruges.” It is in fact, considerably darker and more
twisted, but equally entertaining.
DOCUMENTARY OF THE YEAR – “The Tinder Swindler.” -
Netflix
There are SO many documentaries, on pretty much anything, on
SO many streaming services, that you are not gonna watch every one of them. I
know I can’t, so I can only choose from those which I did watch.
This particular movie was fascinating, and no, I have no
sympathy for either side. For the women who were conned by this guy, let’s be
honest, if the dude drove a bus, you wouldn’t have given him the time of day to
even let him smell your used panties. You paid attention to him because he was
rich, not because he was a person of substance. That is on you, not him. Do I
believe that all of the women in this film were gold-diggers? Of course not,
but maybe value something more than money or appearances and you will make
better choices in the future. In the long run, girls who marry old men for
money are never truly happy, and convincing themselves that they are can be
very exhausting emotionally.
As for Mr. Shimon Hayut,
he did indeed prey on some women’s love for money and status, and he certainly
cannot be blamed for what some women are attracted to, but he did break the
law, and he deserved A LOT more prison time. In the end, there are no real
victims or martyrs here, just a bunch of self-entitled brats that got what they
deserved. Still an incredibly gripping watch however.
ALBUM OF THE YEAR – “I Don’t Live Here Anymore (Deluxe
Edition)” – The War On Drugs
I know it was a tie last year because truthfully I just
really loved both those albums. I have to say that this year was equally
difficult to choose, which I must admit was refreshing given the rants I go on
about how shitty music is today. I love having to admit that there are some
pretty good bands making some pretty good music lately, you just don’t hear
them unless you listen to college radio.
The first incarnation of this record was pretty good, but
the deluxe version added some songs that I couldn’t believe didn’t make the
first cut. Look, unless you are a truly great established band, don’t make a
double album. You are not The Rolling
Stones (Exile on Main Street) The Beatles (The Beatles) or Led Zeppelin (Physical Graffiti) no
one gives a shit about your overblown sense of self-importance (Looking at YOU Beach House, although Once Twice Melody was a pretty good
album in some places). But there are some instances where what is on the cutting
room floor isn’t so bad.
COOLEST SONG BY A MAJOR ACT THAT WASN’T A BIG HIT – “Here To Forever” – Death Cab For
Cutie
God how I have always hated that fucking name. But this is a
nice song.
COOLEST SONG OF THE YEAR – “I Like You (A Happier Song)”
Post Malone, Doja Cat
Don’t let the name fool you, this is definitely NSFW. I
cannot say I am a major fan of either of these two, but this song is catchy. You
know, I think mainstream radio would have responded even more with a decent
clean version of this song. I do not know why acts today insist on making
people censor them. It’s not necessarily novel anymore, so why still do it?
COOLEST SONG OF THE YEAR BY A BAND YOU’VE NEVER HEARD OF
– “the angel of 8th avenue” – Gang of
Youths
Look, the lack of capital letters in the title is not my
doing, that’s how the song is listed. So hipster bullshit attempt to be cool
aside, this song is really cool. It is one of those New York City rock songs, from a band, oddly enough, that isn’t
even from New York.
COOLEST ACT OF THE YEAR – Soccer Mommy
You thought it was gonna be Japanese Breakfast, didn’t you? Yeah I liked that album too, it was
great, but nah…gonna go with Soccer Mommy because I’m not a bandwagon jumper
and these guys were cool. A great album is one that you can listen to without
skipping a song. “Sometimes, Forever”
did that for me this year. Is it the next “In
Utero?” No, but what the fuck is?
SPORTS TEAM OF THE YEAR
– The National Football Team of
Argentina
If you know me, you know the Soccer team I root for, and
have rooted for since I was a child, and that is the national team of Argentina. I guess it started growing
up in a neighborhood full of Latinos and the only team making any sort of
international dent was Argentina.
For Lionel Messi,
arguably the nation’s greatest player, it was sweet vindication as he had
obtained every conceivable award as a player, but until now, a World Cup Championship had long eluded
him. Then there is Andres Cantor, World
Cup announcer who was born in Buenos
Aires, whose sheer joy reminded us that we are all human.
But of all this joy, there is still one thing I can’t get
out of my mind: Can you imagine if Diego
Armando Maradona were alive to have seen this happen? The memes, the
stories, the comments would have been phenomenal.
ATHLETE OF THE YEAR – Aaron Judge, New York Yankees MLB
I don’t if he is this year’s greatest athlete, or the
athlete who had the greatest year. But in just 12 short months, this guy went
from having a mildly good season last year where he did have some injuries, to
this year, which was one for the ages.
Let’s go the field first shall we? Judge’s quest to break
the American League single season
homerun held by Yankee legend Roger
Maris since 1961 was a wonder to behold. I was at the game where he hit his
60th in a comeback win and I had never seen the new stadium break
out into such ear-splitting cheers in my life. I will at least not at this
time, participate in the argument that Judge is the legitimate single season
homerun record holder due to the accusations leveled on the actual leader of
steroid use. I will just say that living in New York City has great stories every year, and this was one of
them.
It was the 62 homeruns, combining with a .311 batting
average and a league leading 135 RBIs that had Judge flirting with the triple
crown all year, and ultimately lead him to becoming the 14th Yankee
to win the American League MVP. He
also led all of MLB in not just homers and RBI, but in runs scored, total
bases, and slugging. A year like that and it is easy to see why he is the first
Yankee to do it since Alex Rodriguez
in 2007.
So how tense do you think those winter meetings were, huh? I
have to admit I really was totally convinced that Judge would always re-sign
with the Yankees until I heard the other teams offers. But the ownership not
only gave him 9 years at $360 million, which in baseball terms is actually a
fair deal, but they also named him captain of the team, the first since Derek Jeter. Quite the ride.
OVERRATED ATHLETE OF THE YEAR– Christiano Ronaldo - Soccer (Football)
You know, it has always been easy to hate on this guy, and I
always thought that it was a bit undeserved.
It’s not his fault that he is both talented at his
profession while being incredibly good looking. I mean, I can certainly relate…
This year however, was a considerable cliff for this guy.
His former club team, the legendary Manchester
United, didn’t play him much at the end of the season. To add insult to
injury, he was also benched playing for Portugal
in the World Cup. Once again,
not totally his doing. But what bothered me about this guy is where he signed
to play this year.
After such a forgettable year by one of soccer’s greatest
players, you’d think his next contract would give him a reported $75 million a
year, but guess what? It did. Saudi
Arabian club Al-Nassr decided to
give him that even after watching the controversial manner in which he left
Manchester United. Guess when you have a name that big, it doesn’t matter how
well you played the year before. Given the level of competition in the desert,
I think he may well get some numbers, but this is a show biz move, not an on
the field move.
Can I also mention that last year’s winner of this award is
actually thriving coming off the bench for The
Los Angeles Lakers?
BELOVED ATHLETE WHO REALLY SHOULD RETIRE – Tom Brady,
Quarterback, Tampa Bay Buccaneers, NFL.
Think I’m gonna go with Tom
Brady, even though I wouldn’t call him “beloved.” Look, the fact that this
guy has been not only playing, but thriving as an NFL quarterback well after age 40, makes him one of the greatest
ever, not to mention that he has a multi-million dollar TV contract waiting for
him after he hangs it up, so why keep doing this?
Look at what it has cost him. Yes his team is in 1st
place in their division, but they are also below .500 and struggling against
good teams. He is losing his cool at his teammates very publically and that has
never been his style. Not to mention the toll his decision to come out of
retirement has taken on his personal life. Something that also, until now, had
been quite private.
Look, I may never have been a fan, but he has given enough
to this game, time to enjoy the rest of your life.
BIGOTED ASSHOLE(S) OF THE YEAR – Well, it Ain’t Just One, and They are NOT
From Jackson Heights
You know what is odd? As I was writing this, I couldn’t come
up with just one person that has personified bigotry this year. What I kept
thinking about was how bigotry as a whole is just dramatically on the rise in
the United States and the question that keeps popping up is when did we all
become such pussies? Why and when exactly did we become so afraid of people?
Seriously I thought that as a whole, this country had
progressed to a point where attacks against immigrants and the LGBTQ community would not be this bad,
but they are. And this is an example I may hate to use, but I have to be
objective.
One of the most diverse communities in the world is a place
I have been more than happy to call my home since I was a child. I was here when
it was not so great, and I had to walk over passed out heroin addicts in the
subway, and I am here now, having survived gentrification but watching my
neighborhood improve to the level of a place where me and my friends always
promised each other that we would move our parents to one day.
In Jackson Heights we have always been tolerant. Even when
the neighborhood was at its roughest, we were never bigots. Which is why I can
say with certainty that NONE of the cowards who called themselves “Protestors,”
harassing members of the LGBTQ community who just wanted to read to kids, were
recognized by a lifelong resident of this neighborhood. I still cannot believe that
bigots were protesting in front of my library, against a group of people that
had done nothing to them. I can assure you that those few assholes do not
represent who we are as a community. Oh, and next time, if you wanna give a Nazi salute in my neighborhood, do it without the mask so we can recognize you. Let’s
see how far you get then.
DEAD PERSON OF THE YEAR – Her Royal Majesty Queen Elizabeth
II
We lost some greats this year, as we do every year, Jerry Lee Lewis, Barbara Walters, Mikhail Gorbachev, Vin
Scully, Bill Russell, Pele (an all-time great human, not just athlete) and Pope Benedict XVI (maybe not great, but
certainly significant).
But I think I am gonna go with Her Royal Majesty Queen Elizabeth II. Look, I’m not gonna get into
a debate about the British Royal family, or monarchies in general, but what you
cannot deny is how incredibly significant this woman’s life was. She managed
the slow decline of the British Empire with a rare dignity. She kept up a fierce
schedule well into her 90’s and did her absolute best to represent her country
in the best way possible. That is not deniable. She handled controversy with
distance and clarity, rarely showing emotion, and this was not always admired
by all. Keep calm and carry on was written for her.
Here’s hoping the New Year brings you everything you want!
Make no mistake, this phony cynicism, complete
indifference, lazy ignorance and outright stupidity is what has today, turned
the United States of America, the greatest experiment in democracy in human
history, into the world of “The Handmaid’s
Tale.”
Do you think that the Supreme Court of the United
States, in today’s decision to overturn “Roe vs. Wade” even took into account
that a Gallup poll showed that this is not even what the majority of Americans
wanted? This decision has absolutely NOTHING to do with abortion, and everything
to do with a group of angry old white men wanting to control women’s bodies because they
are still bitter that they couldn’t get laid in high school.
So, still think elections don’t matter? Justices Neil
Gorsuch, Brett Kavanaugh and Amy Coney Barrett, were all appointed by a twice
impeached, lying, ignorant, racist, fascist, misogynistic, xenophobic,
unqualified, pussy grabbing, five time draft dodging coward, useful idiot
Russian asset and criminal traitor with American blood on his tiny, incompetent
hands. All three should be impeached by the way, for lying under oath during
their confirmation hearings when asked whether or not they believed Roe was
settled law.
I could go on, I am so upset that a rant probably is in order,
but the context is too important, and I do not want to diminish anyone’s
attention span, so I will ask you to look beyond this decision and think about
the long term ramifications of the reasoning.
The opinion was
about 78 pages long, with a 30 page appendix. That’s a whole lotta paper used
to distract you from the fact that the reasoning, at its fundamental core, says
that there is no inherent right to privacy or personal autonomy in any provisions
of the US Constitution — and similarly, no evidence that peoples' reliance on the
court's abortion precedents over the past half century should matter. (kinda
makes that whole “Bill of Rights” thing a tad inconvenient, doesn’t it?) Do you
realize what this means for previous Court decisions concerning marriage and
gender equality? Do think that Alito’s wording that “nothing in this opinion
should be understood to cast doubt on precedents that do not concern abortion,”
is really gonna mean shit to the
unqualified lapdogs that were put on the SCOTUS by that pig Donald Trump? Who
incidentally has been accused of paying for at last count, EIGHT abortions for his porn star
mistresses.
“Well kids, it’s that time of year again, I must say this
decade flew by in a flash, and just how the fuck are we still alive?”
If you remember, this was actually the headline of LAST
year’s JB Random Report End of the Year
Awards. I used it almost tongue in cheek-ly. Now it really is a question
that needs to be asked seriously, even if this has always been a somewhat
lighthearted look at the events of the past year…
NEWS STORY OF THE YEAR – Democracy being under attack and Republicans not seeming to care
So…January 6th huh?
Next week, it would have been a year since democracy in the United States, the country that once
symbolized its modern form, almost really came to an end. What is worse, is
that Republican lawmakers who historically attacked anyone who they didn’t feel
were patriotic enough, seemed to turn a blind eye when their country was
attacked by insurgents.
What infuriates me the most about this is the indifference
that Republicans, other than Liz Cheney seem to have over the
matter. So let’s not forget their lies and cowardice, shall we? Here are but a
few gems that will hopefully resonate throughout history when needed:
Rep. Andrew Clyde
(R-Ga.) say “You know, if you didn’t know the TV footage was a video from
Jan. 6, you’d think it was a normal tourist visit.”
Rep. Paul Gosar
(R-Ariz.) said Ashli Babbitt, a
rioter shot and killed by a Capitol
Police officer as she tried to jump through a window smashed by the mob
right outside the House chamber was a “veteran wrapped in an American flag” who
was “executed.”
Rep. Ralph Norman
(R-S.C.) “I don't know who did a poll to say that they were Trump
supporters,” Norman said of the mob, many of whom were carrying signs or
wearing clothing indicating their support for Trump.
Rep. Jody Hice
(R-Ga.) “In fact, it was Trump supporters who lost their lives that day,
not Trump supporters who were taking the lives of others.”
As of today, five Capitol Police officers have died by
either stroke or suicide, and there is no arguing that the riot of January 6th
did not exasperate the causes which lead them there, so fuck these assholes. Mind you, these are actually fucking lawmakers. Senators and
congressmen. Saying that this was some sort of innocuous event. Cowering so
pathetically to the popularity that Donald
Trump has with their ignorant racist base, that they are willing to look past
an insurrection that cost lives, and has to date lead to 700 arrests in 45
states.
Is this the country you want to live in?
PERSON OF THE YEAR –Alexei Navalny, Russian Lawyer and Activist
Well yeah, it’s not gonna be Elon Musk. What were you thinking
Time Magazine? I know he is friends
with the owner, but come on. You can do so much better than a billionaire
playing astronaut. You know who won their readers poll? Brazilian President and Trump
wanna-be Jair Bolsonaro. Damn.
I seriously thought of Capitol
Police Officer Eugene Goodman, but someone on the internet beat me to it.
I went with Russian
anti-corruption activist Alexei Navalny,
because he has bigger balls than anyone and I hate Vladimir Putin. For those of you who don’t know, he was the guy
that Putin tried to have killed in Germany
using his old KGB method of
radiation poisoning. Navalny not only recovered, but decided to go back to fucking Russia. Proving that
nothing scares a gutless bully more than a single man without fear, Putin
promptly had him arrested and suppressed all protests calling for his release.
He still sits in prison now, a symbol of how fragile and corrupt Putin’s
dictatorship is.
TV SHOW
OF THE YEAR –The“Peaky FOOKIN’ Blinders” – Netflix
For me? Well that’s the beauty of streaming combined with a
pandemic. I can be so late to the party but still appreciate a great show. So
this program started years ago, and given the fact that one of the actors has
died, its future is uncertain, but I did not enjoy watching a show more this
year than this one. and all the memes it inspired too.
Yes I know it is not technically “this years” show, but who
cares, now is when I appreciated it and it’s my list.
ASSHOLE OF THE YEAR – Sen. JoeManchin (D?-WV)
The one asshole that is holding back one of the most
important pieces of legislation since the Affordable
Care Act is this asshole from West
Virginia, and all of us should be baffled as to why. A great question for
another time is “when was the last time Republicans
passed any significant legislation, much less a bill that actually helped
Americans and made their lives better? So here is President Joe Biden, with a narrow majority in the Senate actually doing the job he was
elected to do, and this asshole holding it up like a true loyal Republican.
"I have always said, 'If I can't go back home and
explain it, I can't vote for it.' Despite my best efforts, I cannot explain the
sweeping Build Back Better Act in West
Virginia and I cannot vote to move forward on this mammoth piece of
legislation." This is a quote from Manchin. This legislation will improve
our crumbling 3rd world infrastructure, provide for child health care
and address climate change, so of course he should be against it, right?
OK so then explain this: On December 22, 2021, The United Mine Workers of America
rallied in support of the Build Back Better Act, and they asked Manchin to
support it. Manchin was named an honorary member of the same union last year. I
am serious. The Union that supports the biggest industry in his state, that he
has made millions off of, is asking him to reassess his position and support
the bill. This fucking asshole’s own constituents
want him to stop cockblocking Build Back Better. One is compelled to ask, why
be against it, other than to play both sides of an extremely divisive political
atmosphere and try to insinuate yourself into a greater position of power?
MOVIE OF THE YEAR –“Summer
of Soul”
Now of course I am so into documentary films I can watch a
documentary about paint drying, so it is easy to see why I am so biased towards
them. Not that there were no good non-doc movies, it’s just that the
documentaries I saw were better, and it’s my list. Qwestlove is a great musician, but not someone who I would think I
would want to produce a movie for me. But then he finds hours of nearly
forgotten footage of the 1969 Harlem Cultural Festival. Mind you, this was the
same summer that another certain little music festival was held on a farm close
to Woodstock, a few miles north in
the same state.
I sat through this thing not even thinking about when there
would be a break in the action and I could look at my phone or go to the
kitchen. Every minute of this film was mesmerizing, probably because we had
never seen this footage before, or some of these artists in this context (Wait
till you hear some of Nina Simone’s remarks).
And then of course, there’s the music…
DOCUMENTARY OF THE YEAR – “Rompan Todo. The History of Rock in Latin America” - Netflix
I remember television that was not geared towards a specific
person, and you watched shit when It came on, not when you wanted to. Now we
live in an Orwellian digital world that knows exactly what you like and will
give it to you when you want it because its algorithm watches your every move.
So thanks for that Netflix. This was the best documentary I saw all year. What
I loved the most about it was its thoroughness and how they gave every band
their due time and respect, based on (and rightfully so) a combination of
musical credibility, with popularity and their influence on other bands.
Netflix seems to have someone on the inside who loves Rock en Espanol, because
there are a few docs made about these bands on their service. I hope one on
Soda Stereo is next.
I’ll talk about “Get
Back” some other time
ALBUM OF THE YEAR – Leon Bridges - “Gold-Diggers Sound” and
Nas – “Kings Disease II”.
For the first time in the history of the JB Random Report,
it’s a tie…
Both these records were constant play for me this year. Now
usually this is where I rant about how public radio is now the only radio that
matters, but no one really listens to radio anymore so fuck it. So Leon Bridges has been on my radar for years, he is an
awesome neo soul artist that gets no airplay on black radio for some reason. This
record was absolutely magnificent, masterfully blending old and new with a
unique, original sound.
And Nas, well, Nas is Nas and always will be. He is the
greatest word to word rapper this side of Rakim
(Really Jay-Z, chill with your
billions and don’t poke this bear, my dude…). The rhymes on this record are all
good, and the collaborations flow so smoothly and evenly, not forced or
contrived like so many others in hip hop.
COOLEST SONG BY A MAJOR ACT THAT WASN’T A BIG HIT – “The Bandit” – Kings of Leon
I have no idea why this didn’t catch on. It was a cool song
that showed that they are growing with their audience.
Honorable mention goes to “Charming Mess” - The Black Crowes. This wasn’t actually recorded
this year, but 30 years ago for their breakthrough debut album “Shake Your Moneymaker” but for
inexplicable fucking reason, it didn’t make the cut. So they decided to release
some songs from those sessions and this gem was one of them.
COOLEST SONG OF THE YEAR – “Valentine” – Snail Mail
Yes I know it seems like I’m bandwagon jumping, but other
than the constant Facebook ad bombardment, did you even actually listen to
this, bro? It really is catchy.
COOLEST SONG OF THE YEAR BY A BAND YOU’VE NEVER HEARD OF
– “Across That Fine Line” – Nation of Language
On an album full of resurrected 80’s drum machine bits, this
one stands out for some reason.
COOLEST ACT OF THE YEAR – Leon Bridges
I have been singing (no pun intended) this guy’s praises for
years, and I always felt ignored. Ever since I first heard him, I knew he was
gonna be great. Neo Soul is quickly becoming a constant on every playlist of
mine, and I am totally here for it.I also predict that he is gonna have one of those big Grammy
years where people go “who is this dude, why haven’t I heard of him and why is
he winning so many Grammys?”
SPORTS TEAM OF THE YEAR
– The Milwaukee Bucks NBA
OK so maybe Tom Brady
did win his 7thSuper Bowl
a feat that will probably never be duplicated, but it’s my list so fuck Tom
Brady. And while I’m at it, fuck New
England too, just in case Bill Belichick
has one more in him.
You know why The Bucks were the team of the year? Because
they won their championship the right way. By drafting, being patient, and
developing players. Their biggest star, 2 time MVP Giannis Antetokounmpo was drafted by the team and chose to stay in
Milwaukee even when more money and a bigger market became available to him. He
refused to workout with other big superstars in the offseason, and wouldn’t
even think to be a part of a LeBron-esque
“Super Team.”
This is what made them such a joy to watch. Admittedly, I
had not watched an entire NBA Finals
in a while, but thanks to the myriad of new and deadlier COVID variants
combined with this team’s story, I did just that. Their story made this series
so compelling, that you find yourself rooting for the team, the town, and how
they did it.
ATHLETE OF THE YEAR – Stephen Curry, The Golden State
Warriors, NBA
Maybe it is a bit premature to crown him MVP just yet. But to come back after
such a devastating injury in your thirties, and have the year he is having is
nothing short of remarkable. This year he is only breaking the all-time 3 point
record, 2nd in the NBA in scoring, and has his team in 1st
place in their Conference. And that is all without Klay Thomson coming back yet.
OVERRATED ATHLETE OF THE YEAR– Russell Westbrook, Los Angeles Lakers, NBA.
This one hurts because I love watching this guy do what he
does. But he is the ground equivalent to this era what the great Dominique Wilkins was in the air in the
1980’s. Awesome to behold, but just can’t seem to win.
Westbrook was part a team in Oklahoma City that was built the right way (see more below) and
along with perennial all-stars James
Harden and Kevin Durant they had
some great years and were on their way to being an excellent team but for some
inexplicable reason, they decided to break the team up. Durant being the only
one who has won a Championship. Westbrook is a walking triple-double, and even
that doesn’t translate to his teams winning.
This year, he moved to his now 4th NBA team, to
be part of yet another LeBron James
“Super Team” (more on that later, too) and that team is barely over .500, and
as tough as the Western Conference is, they may not even make the playoffs,
much less get out of the first round. Is it Westbrook’s fault? Certainly not,
but it’s time to stop calling him a savior. In every team he has been on, a
game plan has been tried where he can thrive and win, yet still only one of
those things have happened so far.
BELOVED ATHLETE WHO REALLY SHOULD RETIRE –Ummm…I Dunno
So last year I mentioned Drew Breese of the New
Orleans Saints just because. For the record, I did not call for him to
retire, I just mentioned that everyone else seemed to think he should, and he
promptly did. He is great as a broadcaster, btw.
So this year, I am still at odds, but if you force me to
pick one, I think I might have to go with Carmelo
Anthony. He is currently playing for The
Los Angeles Lakers as part of that afore mentioned LeBron-esque super team
that isn’t getting it together at all for some reason. Now don’t get it twisted,
just because Carmelo may be ring chasing now, that does not take away what an
accomplished basketball player he has been. He has been an NCAA Champion, a
great player in the league, but what I love most has been his commitment to the
USA Men’s National Team and the Olympics.Carmelo has been a part of USA Basketball
since 2004 and continued to play until 2016, something that many professionals
cannot claim. 4 medals, 3 Gold and a FIBA
Americas title, he wasn’t just there “Dream Team-ing” it, he was dedicated
to his country’s team. He will always have my respect for that.
BIGOTED ASSHOLE OF THE YEAR – Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene, R-GA.
This is an easy one. So let’s start with a quote, shall we?
"America is a
nation with a border, and a culture, strengthened by a common respect for
uniquely Anglo-Saxon political traditions.”
Ohh it gets better…
”…societal trust and
political unity are threatened when foreign citizens are imported en-masse into
a country, particularly without institutional support for assimilation and an
expansive welfare state to bail them out should they fail to contribute positively
to the country."
This is a direct quote from a charter attempting to organize
an “America First” Congressional caucus. A. Direct. Quote. In 2021. This was
actually presented to Congress for consideration…in 2021. The founder? Ms.
Taylor Greene. If this really needs further explanation, delete your account.
DEAD PERSON OF THE YEAR – There just can’t be only one…
We always lose some good ones every year, and lately I have
mentioned more than one significant loss in any given year, and I’m afraid this
year is no different. But this year’s choices made me realize something that
may make me sound like a Boomer but, here it goes…We are losing folks that we
genuinely cannot replace because they just don’t make them like that anymore.
And by that I mean, totally original, accomplished individuals who were
pioneers of their chosen profession. At press time, there are unconfirmed
reports that TV icon Betty White is
dead, I hope that’s not true…
Let’s start with the most recent ones first. Can anyone
replace what John Madden meant, not
just to football as a Super Bowl winning coach and a lively broadcaster, but to
pop culture in general? Here is a man who re-introduced himself to future
generations just by allowing Electronic
Arts to use his name to sell a video game. That game is now the most
popular sports video game of all time.
Has the world produced another fearless activist to take the
place of Nobel Peace Prize winner Bishop Desmond Tutu?
For me personally, the loss of Charlie Watts, drummer of my all-time favorite band The Rolling Stones, was difficult. I
saw him play with the band so many times. His steady yet versatile when needed
style is something that I do not think the band can find in anyone else.
And while we are on the topic of musicians, why did they
still let an 81 year old Vicente
Fernandez bring his gun to the stage until his death this year? What if he shot the maracas
player?