The JB Random Report 7/30/10

NEWS & CURRENT EVENTS

A lot of crazy shit going on in the House of Representatives this week, huh?

Did you see Anthony Weiner lose it on the House floor yesterday? Sure it was a bit of a grandstanding, showboating, "AL Pacino in 'And Justice For All'"-type move, but in this particular case, I believe his outrage to be genuine, as would anyone else who is grateful for those who helped out in the recovery during 9/11. Remember when he ran for mayor of New York City? He seems like an intelligent, competent guy, but I really can’t see myself voting for anyone named “Weiner.”
By rejecting this bill Republicans have reached the epitome of what is petty, obstructionist politics. I can’t wait to see any Republican retard defend not voting for this bill with any intelligent argument. These are same Republicans who claim to be the most patriotic. Hypocrites who drone on about how much they love America yet can’t seem to get around voting against every piece of legislation designed to help Americans.
The cop-out was simply that the sponsors put the bill up as emergency legislation, so it couldn’t be watered down or weighed down by ridiculous riders such as anti-abortion regulations. The drawback is that it required a 2/3 majority, which it did not get. Simply put, Republicans are saying “We will allow this bill to pass by a regular majority vote only if we can add irrelevant crap to it.” It should be noted that 12 Republicans did vote for the bill as is, but that’s way too little sanity amongst a party that is really beginning to frighten me, and America should be just as afraid.

Ever heard that phrase “be careful what you wish for?” Well Republicans wanted former Chairman of the House Ways and Means Committee Charles Rangel to have his ethics trial during an election season, and they have it. However, given his indifference to settle the case, I think the old guy might have some sort of ace up his custom fitted sleeve. If Republicans push too hard they might be reminded of how powerful this man actually is. When properly inspired, I can do a pretty good imitation of the Congressman, by the way. I got major laughs with it in school. They better hope they are right or sympathy might shift, giving democrats the edge they need in the elections.

SPORTS

Diego Maradona deserved better from Argentine soccer. He led that team to the quarter finals of the World Cup, and got the most out of players who didn’t exactly have great individual games (right Messi?). To be fired because he was loyal to his staff and assistant coaches is just wrong. Now, I remember when this happened to another great first time manager of a legendary team, who just got another job this week. Buck Showalter was let go by the Yankees in 1995 because he wanted to hang on to certain members of his coaching staff. He went on to have success as a manager for other teams, and this week got the job with the Baltimore Orioles. Now, the Orioles are in dead last place, but I can tell you one thing, the culture there is gonna change, and change quickly. They might not make the playoffs this year, but Showalter will not tolerate those who tolerate losing. I bring this up because I can think of a great job for Maradona…how about a young up and coming team that also needs a change in attitude? How about Maradona coaching Team USA? It would take more than a miracle of course, but could you imagine how interesting that would be?

THIS WEEK’S REASON WHY TERRORISTS WANNA KILL US

How could it not be “The Jersey Shore” Season 2? I admit I don’t watch that show enough to say whether it sucks or not, but I don’t have to listen to Jennifer Lopez’s new album to know I wouldn’t like it, nor do I have to try heroin to know it's bad for you. And speaking of JLo, I will say this now…if the rumors are true that she might be a judge on American Idol, the show just jumped the shark. I hope there are enough maniacs at the auditions to tell her off or throw shit at her.
Anyway, back to these Jersey Shore people…They represent nothing that I find valuable culturally. Am I the “be-all-end-all” of what is culturally relevant in society? No (well actually, yeah, I do like to think I am) But I am certainly entitled to my view, and I just don’t see anything of value in watching a bunch of skanks get wasted at a different club every night.
But the kicker was when these wastes of space were actually on the floor of the New York Stock Exchange to ring the opening bell. Are you fucking kidding me? Then again, New Kids on the Block did it too. However, when the cast proceeded to take out rulers and ask where the naked guys were, an official politely reminded them that it was the “stock” exchange, not anything else.