Thursday, August 20, 2009

The JB Random Report 8/20/09


There are a lot of reasons to love Argentina. The National Soccer team, hot blondes, Soda Stereo and a great Malbec.

NEWS & CURRENT EVENTS

Reporting the news is getting weird. I think Republicans are getting so crazy they will soon be playing with their own poop and believing that Ronald Reagan is coming to take them back to the mother ship. So instead of reminding everyone that the proposed government health care plan does not include death panels or federally funded abortions let’s report some good news…
Robert Novak was a right wing maniac, I say was cuz he dropped dead. He died of brain cancer. I didn’t know he had a brain, but whatever. For those of you who don’t remember, this is the asshole who first published the name of CIA agent Valerie Plame.

SPORTS

I rarely talk football in August, especially when the Yankees are doing so well, but if Brett Favre was too lazy to go to training camp with the Minnesota Vikings, why not just say so? I don’t care how well he says he knows the offense, he is 39 years old with a bad rotator cuff, there is no way you can tell me that a guy his age will be in football playing shape by Friday…Friday, when he is scheduled to start in a pre-season game against the Kansas City Chiefs. This is not a good impression to make on guys who are half his age that are depending on him. He should have toughed out camp with the rest of the players. Yeah remember the players? The guys you are gonna have to play 16 regular season games with? Look I can’t argue that even a 39 year old Favre makes the Vikings a much better team, but for a guy in the twilight of his career, do you really wanna go out like a selfish, bad teammate? A sentiment quietly echoed by some guys on his former team, the New York Jets? As for his legacy, it is totally secure, remember Joe Montana playing for the Chiefs? Or Jerry Rice playing for Seattle? Of course you don’t, and neither does anyone else. Mark October 15th on your calendar, it’s when the Vikings go to Green Bay.
Speaking of the Jets, I was at the famous Mark Sanchez sequence game against the St Louis Rams, so I’m not surprised at all that he will be starting this week’s pre season game. There is no QB controversy with the Jets, Sanchez should be starting over anyone else they might have right now.
And in more football news, looks like Plaxico Burress will be running routes in prison. You know, jails are for criminals not morons, and to get 2 years for shooting yourself is kinda harsh, this is one time where celebrity actually hurt.

THIS WEEK’S REASON WHY TERRORISTS WANNA KILL US

Gotta love the NYPD…there is nothing better than getting harrassed in 90 degree weather by someone who has never had any real combat training and didn’t get enough attention as a child…Are you like me? Do you support small business? Well if there is one thing I love is an ice cold glass of lemonade in the summertime. Imagine my chagrin when 10 year old Clementine Lee was issued a $50 citation for operating as an unlicensed food vendor, albeit by the Parks Department not the NYPD, but they are all the same breed of asshole. You know summer is hot enough, don’t piss us off even more.

2 comments:

  1. My parents taught me never to rejoice in the death of another human being. Having said that, I assure you that not a tear will be shed for Robert Novak in my house.

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  2. Well I wasn't joyful about his death, just pointing it out. However, treason is a capital crime punishable by death.

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