The JB Random Report 7/30/09

SPORTS

Should Pete Rose be in the Hall of Fame? Every year around this time this debate comes up, every year it doesn’t matter. Except for this year for some reason. This year Commissioner Bud Selig addressed reinstating Rose after a 20 year ban for gambling on his own team when he was manager of the Cincinnati Reds. This is a guy who gambled on his sport, lied about it, then criticized baseball and the sports world for wanting to distance itself from him. This is self entitlement on a massive scale. We already know what he thinks, but if baseball believes that Peter Rose, after 20 years paid his dues for what he was actually guilty of, and he is allowed in the Hall of Fame, then the Hall must open its doors for a man that even his own teammates who were involved in a conspiracy said was innocent, “Shoeless” Joe Jackson. If you have never heard that name, then the damage is done, so I’m gonna give you a brief history lesson.
In 1919 The Chicago White Sox were owned by a notoriously cheap millionaire named Charles Comiskey. The team was comprised of players from all over the country, and given that the Civil War was fought only a generation before, there was still some regional clique forming amongst the players, but the one thing they had in common was their hatred of the owner. The Sox made it to the World Series that year, and lost surprisingly to the Cincinnati Reds, ultimately causing a Grand Jury investigation into whether or not the series was fixed. Even though Jackson admitted involvement, the actual conspirators disputed it, saying that they used his name to impress the gamblers involved. Jackson later recanted his story until his death in 1951, and many other players backed him up. The fallout was substantial. The game suffered financially and baseball appointed a former Federal Judge, Kenesaw Mountain Landis as its first commissioner, who promptly banned all the players involved in the “Black Sox” scandal for life. No one knows what Jackson did, but remember this was an illiterate, humble man who I do not believe knew the implications of what he was doing, guilty or innocent.
Rose is a totally different story isn’t he? He not only knew what he was doing, but he was the chief conspirator, and he was proven guilty. Pete Rose has 4,256 hits in a 23 year career. I think he is a complete asshole, but the Hall of Fame cannot call itself complete unless he is in it. Shoeless Joe Jackson hit .356, had 1,772 hits and 785 RBIs in only a twelve year career…the Hall of Fame is incomplete without him too.

I can’t imagine what would be next for boxing. On the heels of Arturo Gatti (whose wife was cleared in his death) and Alexis Arguello, the sport has now lost Vernon Forrest, a great fighter and an even greater person, to a carjacker no less. This was the guy that beat Shane Mosely twice. But greater still was his charity work. There are people who give a charity their name, and then there are those who actively work in the cause they say they support, and Vernon Forrest did just that with his work with the mentally handicapped. I don’t know how many more losses this sport can take.

Manhattan DA Robert Morgenthau must be a New York Titans fan. He is so old I don’t think anyone has gotten around to telling him that they are now called the Jets. This fossil has turned the Plaxico Burress case into his last gasp (and I mean that literally, this old gasbag is like 100) at political relevance. No one ever gets jail time on a first offense unless it’s an extreme case. Someone carrying a gun into a New York club is not altogether uncommon…let’s be objective here, ok? Would you treat Joe Namath the same way?

It took a lot for the Boston Red Sox to finally beat the so-called “Curse of the Bambino” and win a World Series in 2004…a lot of PEDs. Looks like that “confidential” report naming players who failed drug tests in 2003 includes not only Manny Ramirez, who I guess is in his second trimester now, but also David “Fat Papi” Ortiz. Remember that crap he was spewing about never disrespecting his family, fans or the game by taking steroids? Well if I may paraphrase Shakespeare “The fat dude doth protest too much methinks.” Now we don’t know what he tested positive for, so I’m not about to accuse him of anything at this point, other than having a mouth and a self righteous attitude to match his stomach.

LOVE & RELATIONSHIPS

I was asked if “cybering” should be considered cheating…any thoughts? Does camming naked count? I can’t really help there cause I’m not a cyberer. But if looking at midget porn online while being in a long term relationship is cheating, then I guess I’m guilty.

Michael Jackson with a love child? That he actually conceived? With a woman? Really?

Someone asked me if I had ever paid for sex. Of course I have, it’s called “being engaged.”

And now…some advice. Men, never initiate a conversation about weight with a woman unless you have an overwhelming need to sleep on a couch that night.

THIS WEEK’S REASON WHY TERRORISTS WANNA KILL US

If you are not from New York, you might not have heard of the Naked Cowboy. This is some maniac who sings country songs in Times Square in his underwear, an act he has yet to be arrested for. Anyway, this clown has decided to run for Mayor, and local news media has taken him seriously. He was quoted as saying, "Being naked is a whole lot more than having no clothes on: It's about transparency in politics, it's about telling the naked truth." See this is why I never felt the need to support a boycott of the New York Post when they did that monkey cartoon…why boycott a paper that I wouldn’t even read to a retarded polar bear?