Thursday, February 25, 2010

The JB Random Report 2/25/10

NEWS & CURRENT EVENTS

Did you see the healthcare "summit"? Why not just call it a debate? That's really what it was and I saw for the first time, one man taking on a slew of adversaries and pretty much kicking their collective asses. The lame arguments that Republicans had against health care reform are so pathetic they just threw up their arms and said "we disagree so let's wait" Seriously, fuck you. Yeah…Barack Obama is so stupid he is going to put his greatest presidential legacy on the back burner just be cause you assholes can't obstruct it like you tried to obstruct the jobs bill. This is a Harvard graduate, not Flava Flav in the Oval Office you assholes. And I’m sorry but I LOVED the smug look he gave these jerks. His every gesture just seemed to exude the phrase, “Are you fucking kidding me?” Well what did you expect when they presented nothing of substance, just a desperate plea not to succeed on their watch, pathetically disguised as “concern?” We don’t just need health care reform, we need political reform. Why is it that even voters of minimal intelligence can’t see how high the crybaby factor is with Republicans?

That Orca that killed her trainer at Sea World really should send a message to the rest of you humans. There is a reason why they call them Killer Whales. Hey animal lovers, animals know who is polluting the water, cutting down the rain forests and causing unnatural climate change, they don't like us. And they are looking for every opportunity to kill us. Remember that lady that got her face ripped off by an angry chimp? Or that tiger that nearly took Roy’s head off? Or was it Siegfried? Anyway, neither one of those ladies is never gonna be the same again. Look, at the risk of pointing out the obvious, wild animals are not cute, stay away from them.

SPORTS

There is a requiem being played for NFL all-pro running backs over 30. LaDainian Tomlinson will probably hook up with another team, but Brian Westbrook, given his history of injuries, concussion included, may have a really hard time finding another job.

Speaking of looking for another job, Derek Jeter and Mariano Rivera are free agents this year, and the Yankees have stuck to their policy of not negotiating during the season. They are making a mistake. These players are at level with DiMaggio, Mantle and Whitey Ford, and they should be given the same respect. After all they have done for the city and the team; they should be allowed to retire on their own terms both financially and professionally, so you make an exception for exceptional players. How can you demand excellence when you don’t reward it?

THIS WEEK’S REASON WHY TERRORISTS WANNA KILL US

Seriously who the fuck are these “Tea Party” people? What exactly is their agenda? Other than being ultra conservative and hating the fact that there is a black man in the White House doing a great job appeasing a minority of Republican maniacs in the legislature, what do they stand for? Well, one of their biggest platforms is lower taxes right? Then why is it that in a CBS poll, 44% of these Tea Party idiots think that taxes have gone up, when in reality the Obama administration has passed 25 different tax cuts to working families? 46% believed they stayed the same, and only 2% acknowledged that they went down. This is the group that wants you to share their views on taxes, something they obviously know nothing about. It’s like me asking you to share my views on who the hottest guy is on “The Jersey Shore,” or some other shit that I would remove both my eyes before I ever watched. When the fuck did it become OK to not know anything and still run your mouth? And why are they being listened to? When did stupid become acceptable as long as you waved the correct flag? Why am I cursing so much?

These intellectual wastes of space are so out of touch with reality that their original name was “Tea baggers” until someone told them what that meant in the gay community. I wonder who let them know? Maybe some of their “conservative” supporters like Ted Haggard, Mark Foley or Larry Craig.

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